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Friday, February 11, 2011

"These things are your becoming."

I got this goodness from one of the deans, who got it from one of the student lists. It made us both a little teary. And then she said, "I'm writing music right now and I"m thinking I might reach out to this author, ask if I can collaborate with her on turning this into a song. Well, maybe not the heroine part." (It amused me to hear that the dean is writing music, in the way that it must amuse my students to hear that I love karaoke.) Anyway, this dean was like, "Well, maybe not the heroine part." And then we were both like, *shrug* "Maybe the heroine part, too!" *laugh* It was a funny moment.

A funny moment. I'd just had coffee with two professors, to talk to them about teaching, at a moment when I'm looking forward to teaching my own class for the very first time, which might also be the last. This alongside having an article and an invitation to give a paper (so, I'm validated as an academic?) to think about while simultaneously beginning to consider what my backup career path will be in case the fellowships (no jobs to apply for) simply do not materialize (oh, right - only maybe, if the fates allow). Note that I'm not even touching the weight/love life part. The gravitational pull of that one is too strong for this post.

I want to send it to my little sisters, who are not yet 20-something, though I know I cannot make those future versions of them understand what their present selves have not yet lived. Those things are their becoming.

I want to send it to that younger me, who once was 20-something (was she, really?), though I know she is no longer there, is already moving through time, faster than she can imagine, towards where she sits now - was sitting then, when she wrote this - having already become who she is today, on her way to who knows what next.

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